Gloria Speaks

by Gloria Feldt on July 15th, 2010
in and tagged
March is Women’s History Month. Book me now for a women’s history speech, because my calendar is filling up quickly.

WHAT DO I TALK ABOUT?
I’m a best selling author and nationally recognized leader for women’s empowerment. As a frequently cited expert on women and power, politics, worklife, health, media, and intergenerational concerns, my speeches and seminars have inspired many thousands of participants while delivering practical leadership skills. Recent speech topics:

• No Excuses: The 9 Ways Women Can Change How We Think About Power—and Why Men Are Going to Love It
• Sister Courage: How to Apply Movement Building Principles to Work—and Everything Else
• Eight Leadership Lessons I Learned from Margaret Sanger
• Leading Into the Wave: The 7 C’s of How and Why to Embrace Controversy
• We’ve Come a Long Way, Maybe: a Brief History of Women Stepping into Power and Stepping Back
• WomenGirlsLadies: A Fresh Intergenerational Conversation (panel with Deborah Siegel, Courtney Martin, and Krystal Brent Zook).
• Women, Power, and Politics
• There was No Temple in Temple: Growing up Jewish in Small-Town Texas and What It Taught Me About Tikkun Olam
• £500 and a Womb of One’s Own—the Economic and Reproductive Justice Connection
• Carpe the Chaos: How to Lead and Live Unlimited in a Time of Perpetual Transition

WHAT MAKES ME AN EXPERT ON THESE TOPICS?
My most fourth and most recent book, No Excuses: 9 Ways Women Can Change How We Think About Power was 18 months in the writing but represents a lifetime of experience. Each of the 9 Ways contains a lesson and a “power tool” delivered through inspiring stories, interactive discussion, and solid information.

People Magazine called me “the voice of experience.” My expertise comes from frontline movement leadership and executive responsibility as former president and CEO of Planned Parenthood Federation of America; my passion for helping women to lead unlimited lives is rooted in personal experience as a teen mom with limited resources and little power. I’m a professor of practice at Arizona State University where I teach a course called “Women, Power, and Leadership.” Read what people say about my speeches.

HOW CAN I HELP ME MEET YOUR GOALS?
Are you are looking for a dynamic keynote speech on women, power, or leadership that will bring people to their feet? A panel, or an experiential seminar that engages, enlightens, and motivates? I work with you to tailor the presentation to your objectives. And I do it with heart and a dash of humor–I like to enjoy myself, too.

WHAT ARE SOME GROUPS I HAVE WORKED WITH?
[You can read a comprehensive list here.]
• University seminars on “Women, Power, and Leadership” or programs for Women’s History Month
• National women’s professional groups seeking to understand intergenerational differences between women in work, politics, and relationships
• Entrepreneurs looking for inspiration and leadership skills
• Activists who want inspirational strategies and leadership effectiveness
• General audiences interested in provocative discussions about gender trends in politics, workplace, and personal relationships
• Women’s groups seeking keynotes that touch the heart and empower their members

EXTRAS:
I’m a seasoned media commentator and fundraiser. I am always happy to take media interviews to publicize the speaking engagement or to participate in social events that support your group’s endeavors.

“The best lecturer we’ve had in my four years on the lecture board.”
~Nick Goldberg, Co-President
Brown University Student Lecture Board

“Gloria tells an inspiring story. Uplifting. Life affirming.”
~Brandeis Women

“Nobody says it like Gloria Feldt.”
~Anna Clark, Blogger at Isak

“How moved I was!”
~Eve Ensler

Read more.

Women’s Equality Day and the Civil Rights March

by Gloria Feldt on August 26th, 2013
in 9 Ways Blog and tagged , , , ,

It was all over the news for days. Every pundit, every political talk show, every newspaper march-on-washington-widerunning big retrospective spreads. Op eds galore, and reminiscences of what it was like to march together toward equality.

Today, August 26 is Women’s Equality Day, the day that commemorates passage of the 19th amendment to the US constitution, giving women the right to vote after a struggle that lasted over 70 years. A big deal, right?

Right. But that’s not what all the news was about. In fact, though President Obama issued a proclamation and a few columnists like the New York Times’ Gail Collins gave it a nod, hardly anyone is talking about Women’s Equality Day. At least not in consciousness-saturating ways that garner major media’s attention, as Saturday’s March on Washington commemorating the 50th anniversary of a similar Civil Rights march.

Yet the two anniversaries are rooted in common values about equality and justice for all. They share common adversaries and aspirations. Racism and sexism are joined at the head

And as League of Women Voters president Elisabeth MacNamara’s article in the Huffington Post explains, both movements today share the challenge of maintaining the right to vote, earned with such toil and tears and even bloodshed.

Like many people who participated in the 1960′s Civil Rights Movement, I celebrate how far America has moved toward racial justice in the last 50 ‘years. I am grateful to the Civil Rights movement for calling our nation not just to fulfill its moral promise to African-Americans, but by its example of courage and activism inspiring the second wave women’s movement, the gay rights movement, and so much more.

I remember having an epiphany while volunteering for a multi-racial civil rights organization called the Panel of American Women, that if there were civil rights, then women must have them too. That awareness ignited my passion for women’s equality which has driven my career ever since.

But just as Dr. Martin Luther King Jr.’s galvanizing “I Have a Dream” speech thundered, “Now is the time to lift our nation from the quicksands of racial injustice to the solid rock of brotherhood,” (emphasis mine) and sisters were not mentioned, women have yet to rise to full equality when it comes to honoring women’s historical accomplishments and current voices.

And just as the commemorative March on Washington was a necessary reminder of how far we have yet to go to reach the full vision of the Civil Rights movement, so Women’s Equality Day is best celebrated by committing ourselves to breaking through the remaining barriers to full leadership parity for women.

Check out Take The Lead‘s two posts on The Movement blog calling attention to the auspicious anniversary.

The first is Susan Weiss Gross’s delightful personal story–the tractor being a perfect metaphor — of how she overcame her internal barriers to equality. The second comes from author and Ms Magazine founding editor Susan Braun Levine. Suzanne will be writing about “Empowerment Entrepreneurs” and how empowering each other is the latest development in women’s equality.

Read, enjoy, and then get to work along with Take The Lead, which I co-founded along Amy Litzenberger early this year,  in our 21st century movement to prepare, develop, inspire, and propel women to take their air and equal share of leadership positions across all sectors by 2025.

As the March on Washington twitter hashtag exhorted us to do, “#MarchOn!”

Leading With Intention

by Gloria Feldt on May 18th, 2012
in Employ Every Medium, Leadership, No Excuses, Power Tools, Use What You've Got, Wear the Shirt and tagged , , , , , , , , , , , ,

Not long ago I sat down with freelance writer Corine Garcia for this interview. The article originally appeared as a blog post at Womenetics.

Years ago, as a teenage mother without a college education, one could only imagine that Gloria Feldt felt somewhat limited in career options. But with the right amount of optimism, the proper use of power and her penchant for saying “Yes” to every opportunity, Feldt paved her way to leadership success as the former president and CEO of Planned Parenthood.

Now, after recently being listed as one of “America’s Top 200 Women Leaders, Legends, and Trailblazers” by Vanity Fair magazine, Feldt’s latest bestselling book “No Excuses: 9 Ways Women Can Change How We Think About Power” offers well-founded advice to other women.

Womenetics: Vanity Fair named you one of “America’s Top 200 Women Leaders.” To what do you attribute your success as a leader?

Gloria Feldt: My grandson Michael recently interviewed me for his college essay and asked, “Grandmother, what factors do you think most contributed to your success in spite of the challenges you faced as a teenage mother without a college education when you started out in your career?”

I blurted out, “I was either dumb enough or lucky enough to say ‘Yes’ to almost every opportunity.”

It took a question from an 18-year-old to make me realize the power of optimism. In the form of saying ‘Yes’ to job offers I hadn’t sought and challenges I hadn’t imagined I was capable of meeting, I had profoundly influenced my career path. My penchant for seeing the possibility of a pony when others saw only a little pile of you-know-what in their path also helped!

But I wasn’t consciously aware of this power and that I had used it to positive effect until Michael asked his question. It’s a sea change for me to assert that my own agency — being optimistic and taking the risk to say ‘Yes,’ rather than pure dumb luck as I usually tell the story — has fueled my success. Even though I exhort other women to do just that.

I reveal this for two reasons: 1) to emphasize that it’s a lifelong process, and one can always learn new things about leadership; and 2) to illustrate that the main thing holding women back today is that we often fail to realize and embrace the power in our hands.

Womenetics: How did you develop and cultivate your leadership skills?

Feldt: Woody Allen has said that 90 percent of success is showing up. I don’t think leadership is a big, mysterious thing. A leader is someone who shows up and gets something done. After I said yes to opportunities, I showed up, studied the situations and got things done. And I learned from each experience, whether I was successful or failed miserably.

One of the nine “Power Tools” I talk about in my book “No Excuses” is “Wear the shirt.” That means to wear the shirt of your convictions. Let people know what you stand for and be accountable for what you intend to do. Telling people what I intend to do holds me accountable, so I have to face whether I did well or poorly. By wearing the shirt, I grew my skills. And I grew courage muscles too: the courage to take responsibility, the courage to put forth a bold and audacious vision, the courage to stay true to my convictions when others opposed me, and the integrity to admit if I was wrong, learn from it, and get up and try again.

Womenetics: Did you have any outside leadership training?

Feldt: I would give credit to the Western Behavioral Sciences Institute’s remarkable International Leadership Forum that I was fortunate to find just at the moment when I needed to learn from successful executives across many sectors of business, government and nonprofit organizations. I remain in touch with people I met there and who have mentored and advised me over the years. It was important to my success that I talk not only to the people in my field, but also to learn across disciplines, especially to get new insights for big and seemingly intractable problems.

Womenetics: Do you think leadership is an innate or learned skill?

Feldt: Both. Anyone who has more than one child knows how different personalities emerge from the same genetics and same environment. And anyone who has taken leadership roles knows the importance of learning every day.

Women leaders seem to have an insatiable desire to keep learning, which is a good thing. I was a teacher before I was a CEO and before I became a writer. Perhaps that’s why I’m now most passionate about teaching women in workshops and keynote speeches about how to use the 9 Ways “Power Tools” I share in “No Excuses.”

Women must learn to use the power we have in our hands if we are ever going to get a fair shake for ourselves and make the leadership contributions of which we are capable.

Womenetics: Can you explain what you mean in your book about women redefining power? Why is this important?

Feldt: I found in my research, in interviews with women across the country and by looking into my own experience, that many women have an outdated definition of power, created by men in a traditional hierarchical world. It’s the “power over.” And that’s not functional for men or women any more.

Women would tell me they don’t like the idea of power, and I realized they were talking about not wanting power over others. Why should they? Women have borne the brunt of that negative kind of power for millenia. It implies that power is a finite pie and if I take a piece, there’s less for you.

But once we redefined power as the more expansive “power to,” I would see women’s faces relax and they could wholeheartedly say, “Yes! I want that kind of power.” Power to is not a finite pie. The more there is, the more there can be, and I believe women inherently understand that concept. “Power to” is innovation. It’s how you make life better for your family, your company, the community or yourself.

“Power over” is oppression. “Power to” is leadership. Women will truly transform the world for much better when we redefine power in this way.

Womenetics: Why are women stuck in 18 percent of leadership roles, as you claim?

Feldt: There are many historical, cultural and structural reasons why women in the U.S. haven’t reached parity. But there are no excuses not to go forward with intention to accomplish what we want. Legal barriers are down. At least one woman has shattered almost every glass ceiling, and doors are cracked enough to get through them.

We’re better educated than men, holding 60 percent of college degrees. Studies by McKinsey and Co., Ernst and Young and other experts show that more women around the decision table result in better decisions and even a better return on investment. Women have the very leadership skills the world needs right now. It’s women’s moment, but do we know it yet?

Apparently not! We keep focusing on the negative statistics, when we would be better served to focus on the opportunities. 
I don’t say it’s easy. I say it’s possible and that we not only have the capability, but also the responsibility to our sisters and ourselves make it happen. I say this not to blame women, but rather to inspire them.

Womenetics: What mediums should women use to harness more power and become effective leaders?

Feldt: The first medium is ourselves, and the power we communicate with our self-presentation and speech.

In the film “The Iron Lady,” we see scenes of former British Prime Minister Margaret Thatcher practicing how to make her voice pleasant but strong. I’m not saying women should remake themselves or become inauthentic, but I do recall that when I was writing “Send Yourself Roses” with the actress Kathleen Turner, she emphasized that women spend a great deal of time and money on our clothing but often overlook the rest of our stage presence, and in particular our voice quality.

From the “No Excuses” Power Tool “Employ every medium,” here are a few tips to help ensure you are taken seriously, and that your voice is heard in business meetings or interviews:

  1. Be the media: Think of media not as an add-on but integral to what you’re doing, even if it’s just internal communication within a company. Use personal, social and traditional media proactively. Beyond your workplace, you can also help support groups like the Women’s Media Center that works to get fair and realistic media portrayals of women.
  2. Say the first word: Don’t wait to speak up if you have an idea to contribute. The first speakers almost always set the tone and define the whole conversation. Be poised, prepared and proactive. Don’t hesitate or apologize. And for goodness sake, don’t end every sentence as though it were a question.
  3. Say the last word: Speak it with authority and clarity. Use simple declarative sentences. Don’t hedge your words or use too many diminishing words like “just,” “maybe” or “little.” Speak as though you know you’ll be respected and believed. Sit up straight and make eye contact.
  4. Speak the language: Understand the conversational rituals that distinguish different types of communications and deploy them to your advantage. This is not about being disingenuous or inauthentic, but rather showing respect for others as well as garnering it for yourself. With men and women in the workplace, I liken this to being bilingual.

Your vision, ideas and plans have the power to shape the future, but not if you keep them to yourself or if you wait for others to set the agenda.

Womenetics: What are the biggest obstacles standing in the way of women leaders?

Feldt: While some external barriers remain, and implicit bias in the workplace still exists, the biggest obstacle is our own ambivalent relationship with power. Companies especially need their high-performing women to stay with them if they are going to be successful, and they know it.

Many women are concerned with work/life balance, for example. But many men today want the same thing, or at least enough that you can use the power tool “create a movement” to get workplace policies that allow for people to have a life and earn a living.

It’s a strategic choice at this point. My goal is to give women the inspiration, information and practical tools to stand in their power comfortably and walk with intention to achieve whatever goals they set and in the end to be able to lead unlimited lives.

Womenetics: How can women use leadership skills in other areas of their lives, aside from work?

Feldt: One of the remarkable things I discovered as I began to study women’s relationship with power is that the dynamics are the same at work, in civic and political life and in personal relationships. It’s important to be aware of that, and then you can apply the same skills in any situation.

Womenetics: Who were your leadership mentors; who has inspired you?

Feldt: I love to talk about the leadership lessons I learned from Margaret Sanger, the founder of the American birth control movement. I’m inspired by the fact that she started with nothing — no money, no supporters, and the laws were all against her — and yet she had the power of an idea that has changed everything for women. There is not a woman today in the workforce who could be there if not for the ability to plan and space her children.

I am also grateful to colleagues from the International Leadership Forum; my first boss, Mildred Chaffin, who saw in me more than I saw in myself; and my father, who always told me I could do “anything your pretty little head desires.” An unusually feminist message for a father in that time.

Womenetics: And last, do you take time for yourself and if so, what do you do?

Feldt: I exercise every day or else I become very crabby. Sometimes it’s hard to give an hour or two to working out, so I often ask people who want to meet with me to do walking meetings, which are much more enjoyable. Since I no longer go to an office daily, I languish in bed in the mornings with my husband, and that feels like a real luxury. Right now, I’m on a mission to get speaking or workshop opportunities at spas so I can combine two of my passions, fitness and sharing what I’ve learned about leadership. Any takers out there, please email me!

Corinne Garcia is a freelance writer and editor living with her husband and two young boys in Bozeman, Mont. She has also written for Women’s Adventure, Christian Science Monitor, Northwest Travel, Pregnancy, Fit Pregnancy and Fit Parent.

Friday Round Up: What Kind of Education = Girl and Woman Power?

by Gloria Feldt on September 30th, 2011
in 9 Ways Blog, Gender, Inspiration, Leadership, No Excuses, Politics, Workplace and tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

MathGirlsAutumn has officially arrived, and with it back-to-school education talk has been a big topic this week. Today’s Friday Round Up explores the power of education in general, and its power to foster gender parity specifically.

President Obama gave his traditional Back-to-School Speech on Tuesday at Benjamin Banneker Academic High School in Washington telling students their achievements are a critical part of a secure future for the United States.

“Soon enough, you’ll be the ones leading our businesses and our government; you’ll be the ones charting the course of our unwritten history. All of that starts this year. Right now. So I want you all to make the most of this year ahead of you. Your country is depending on you. So set your sights high.”

First Lady Michelle Obama pointed the education discussion toward girls and women this week as well and voiced the importance of STEM (Science, Technology, Engineering, and Mathematics) education for young women while at a visit at the National Science Foundation. The NSF was announcing their 10-year plan to increase workplace flexibility in the STEM fields to encourage women and girls to enter these career fields.

First Lady Michelle Obama“And if we’re going to out-innovate and out-educate the rest of the world, then we have to open doors to everyone. We can’t afford to leave anyone out. We need all hands on deck. And that means clearing hurdles for women and girls as they navigate careers in science, technology, engineering and math.

And it starts with lighting the spark for science and math in elementary school and grade school… so encouraging girls early not to lose heart in those fields, and encouraging them through high school is important. But it also means making sure that these young women can keep pursuing their dreams in college and beyond.”

AAUW Executive Director Linda Hallman attended the event with Ms. Obama in recognition of the AAUW’s renewed commitment to building successful local programs to attract girls and women to STEM fields.

“We welcome the administration’s recognition of the vital role the federal government plays in removing occupational barriers to women in these fields. AAUW’s work in this area shows that even small improvements can make a big difference in retaining the best minds in the science and math fields.”

AAUW’s 2010 research report “Why So Few? Women in Science, Technology, Engineering, and Mathematics” provides compelling evidence of the environmental and social barriers that continue to limit women’s participation and progress in those fields.

Girls in ScienceIn Columnist Anna Holmes piece in the Washington Post “Technically, science will be less lonely for women when girls are spurred early” highlighted a story of Maresa Leto, 19, a sophomore at Michigan State who is taking her first computer science course this semester.

“I think it’s just part of what teenage girls are taught, which is to act dumb and cutesy so they don’t intimidate guys,” says Leto, whose older sister Lauren, a tech entrepreneur, urged her to give programming a try. As for the computer science class she’s taking, Leto says that she is one of a handful of women in the class. “No one has commented on the gender disparity, but I am conscious of it. I try to seem smarter than I actually am, just to prove I belong there.”

And even the method of teaching of students was in the news. In Kelly Wallace’s post on iVillage “Girls Rule in Math & Science (Okay, They Don’t Yet But Maybe Someday!)” spoke to the ways young women are taught STEM subjects and seeing some of the old stereotypes crumbling. Wallace profiled a school in Queens, New York that by using the all-girl classroom approach is seeing success.

”The motto at the school is “Girls Rule.” Laura Mitchell, the school’s principal, said with a chuckle, “We like boys but girls rule.” So what’s the message behind “Girls Rule,” I asked? “Empowerment, self-esteem, confidence, and whatever you put your mind to, you can achieve it.”

Women in ScienceBut a contrary view, “The Pseudoscience of Single-Sex Schooling” was published recently in the journal Science by researchers at Arizona State University. ScienceDaily article “Single-Sex Schooling Does not Improve Academic Performance and Can Lead to Gender Stereotyping, Study Finds.” explained a bit about what the research has found so far by the ASU team, including comments by Richard A. Fabes, the director of the ASU School of Social and Family Dynamics and one of the numerous authors of the study.

“Is it ever good to segregate on the basis of race, income or age? I think the answer is no,” Fabes said. “There is no good evidence that it is ever a good time to separate and segregate. Any form of segregation undermines rather than promotes equality.”

There was a rousing debate about this subject on KPCC’s AirTalk that featured Lynn S. Liben one of the co-authors of the ASU study and Dr. Leonard Sax, Director of the National Association for Single Sex Public Education.

I’m conflicted–what do you think? Is “separate but equal” a step ahead or a step back when it comes to women and STEM education? If you are a professional in a STEM field, what’s the right solution? Would love your thoughts!

 

5 Tips to Thrive in Chaos (or What Good Is Vision When You’re up to Your A** in Alligators?)

by Gloria Feldt on September 29th, 2011
in 9 Ways Blog, Carpe the Chaos, Heartfeldt Leadership Advice, Inspiration, Leadership, No Excuses, Power Tools, Workplace and tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,
YouTube Preview Image

I knew there’d be pushback the minute I dubbed vision the #1 leadership characteristic.

“Get real,” several readers e-mailed. It reminded me of the cartoon a colleague once gave me, bearing the caption: “When you’re up to your a** in alligators, it’s hard to remember your goal was to drain the swamp.”

In a time of economic chaos, when many people are desperately trying to keep those writhing reptiles from nipping off their knees, lofty vision talk sounds unrealistic.

It’s difficult to keep your eyes on the prize, your focus on the vision, your hand steady to the wheel when the assumptions you thought were well grounded turn out to be quicksand. But a counterintuitive skill that can help you thrive in times of change and disruption is to embrace chaos as opportunity.

gloria-ipod

 

Listen to Gloria talk about making Chaos into Opportunity.

 

Sara Clemence, 36, is now a travel editor at the Wall Street Journal. But in 2008, she was working her way up the media hierarchy with an undeclared vision of eventually running her own publication. She’d just landed a spot at a hot new magazine, Condé Nast Portfolio when a wave of layoffs knocked her out of her job.

“Getting laid off was a blow to my ego and self-image,” she told me. “I considered myself an achiever, someone who would leave a position for something better, but never lose a job…I spent a weekend lying on the sofa, staring at the ceiling and wondering if I’d ever get up again.”

If that wasn’t enough to rattle her vision, a few months later, Clemence snagged a position with another magazine—and it folded that same day, leaving her unemployed again.

Of course, magazines weren’t the only businesses crumbling. The breadth of the financial industry’s misdeeds were being laid bare. In September, 2008, Lehmann Brothers closed, filing the largest bankruptcy in American history. Over $600 million in debt, setting off a spiraling chaos that has affected every part of the economy, the Lehmann crash knocked many people’s visions for a loop.

With friends experiencing layoffs all around, Clemence and two colleagues seized the opportunity in chaos. They created a website they called Recessionwire. Its goal was to help people get through the challenging times by providing tips to navigate the financial environment, sharing personal experiences, and serving as a source of economic information and trends.

Clemence said, “I needed to give myself the space to feel bad about what had happened. Only then could I start thinking in terms of possibility.”

The chaos was “a chance to consider anything!”

Similarly, as the magnitude of the Lehmann collapse suffused the public consciousness, people began to ask, “What if Lehmann Brothers had been Lehmann Sisters?” The testosterone-driven high-risk culture of the financial industry had clearly failed; that new vulnerability opened people’s minds to embrace change toward greater gender parity.

Credit Image: ideonexus on Flickr

There are no magic answers to keeping true to your vision when the tectonic plates are shifting under your feet. But here are 5 tips to help keep your head above water and the alligators at bay.

1. Think positive. Be like Monty Python: Always look at the bright side of life. You might as well, since chaos is inevitable because change is inevitable. And whoever is most comfortable with the ambiguity created by change is most likely not just to survive but to thrive.

2. See your moment and seize it: Paradigm shifts don’t happen in moments of stability. Wars, economic upheavals, diseases like HIV/AIDS, social justice movements—these all cause social turbulence. “Normal” patterns are interrupted by technological innovations–the automobile, television, the pill, cell phones, the Internet, Twitter. Suddenly, if a woman can offer a solution in a traditional male field, and it works, no one cares whether she has higher-pitched voices and doesn’t follow football scores. Seize the advantage when boundaries are hazy because that’s when the world is open to new solutions.

3. Take the lead. Courage to act in the midst of chaos is the core of leadership: to own responsibility when you don’t have total authority, to make decisions when you know none of the options is perfect, to lead even when you’re quaking in your boots. As Clemence says, “Creating Recessionwire was empowering. I learned a tremendous amount about business, and about—well, remember that old Nike slogan, ‘Just Do It?’ I used to think that people who did extraordinary things were somehow different. I learned that they’re people who ‘Just Do It.’

4. Look through other eyes. How do people in completely different fields and points of view approach chaos? Whatever you think of Sarah Palin, for example, she certainly seized the opportunity during McCain’s 2008 faltering presidential race to propel herself forward. I’m a great fan of cards called “Creative Whacks” to help me think up new solutions for seemingly intractable problems. (And do try to see the humor in every situation—laughter is always useful leavening for new ideas.)

5. Appreciate the potential: Since innovation usually comes from people not regarded as the norm—like a teenaged Bill Gates creating Microsoft in his garage—we often don’t see it coming. Our instinct is to seek stability. That squanders the incredible potential of disruptive change to create new channels of opportunity, more inclusive vocabularies, and better technologies. Chaos signals boundaries are fluid so you can accomplish things you might not have been able to do otherwise.

In the end the person who will be the most successful in leadership is someone who understands that chaos is opportunity waiting to be seized. Clemence suggests asking: “What does this give you the chance to do, see, experience or be? Take that, and then think even bigger.”

When you’ve been in a chaotic situation, in work or in your personal life, did you retreat, or did you step forward and own it, rewriting the rules and setting new parameters? What did you learn that might help others?

This post was originally published in BlogHer Career.  Check it and all my every-other-week leadership Q and A columns out there. I solicit your questions for the column—feel free to post them below or e-mail me.

Ma McDonough Was No Ordinary Woman

by Guest on March 30th, 2011
in Know Your History, Personal Relationships and tagged , , , , , , , ,

Another great guest post. All of them have made this my best WHM series ever. Today’s post is from Liz O’Donnell from Hello Ladies. I hope you enjoy reading about her great-grandmother as much as I do.

I live in the house where I was raised. Some may think of me as a “townie,” one of those New England creatures who never leaves home. And when they look at my house, I’m sure they see a place that needs lots of work. The yard needs landscaping, the upstairs bathroom needs plumbing, and the kitchen has a gaping hole in the ceiling over the sink (see upstairs bathroom). But what they can’t see is the foundation. Not the cement that supports the frame of the house, but the history that holds me up.

This Women’s History Month. While I honor the women who have, should or will make the history books – Rosa Parks, Lilly Ledbetter, Hillary Clinton and so many others, I find myself thinking about my personal history and one of the women who shaped my life. The National Women’s History Project writes, “Learning about women’s tenacity, courage, and creativity throughout the centuries is a tremendous source of strength.” I know this is true.

Eighty years ago, my great-grandmother Ma McDonough bought the house where I live. At that time, women didn’t purchase property, but Ma McDonough was no ordinary woman.

My great-grandmother came from a well-to-do family in Ireland. As was the tradition then, her older brother was set to inherit the family farm and she would inherit nothing. So Ma McDonough left for Boston, rather than be dependent on someone else. She married, raised four children and somehow managed to save money. When her husband died, she moved out of the city and bought herself and three of her then adult children a new house in the suburbs. It was the Great Depression and the builder had run out of money. Ma McDonough had cash and moved in.

My great-grandmother’s financial situation was rare. Many of the neighbors were struggling to feed their families. So, when the grocer cart came by each week selling meat and vegetables, Ma McDonough would buy her food and then buy for the family around the corner. Years later, after my parents bought the house, a man stopped his car and told my sister who was playing in the yard, “Your great grandmother kept this neighborhood alive.”

On Sundays the church paraded orphaned children down the aisle in hopes a parishioner would take them in. Ma McDonough did. And when the boy across the street needed assistance, Ma would give him her own son’s clothes and cigarettes. One day my great-uncle Bart came home from work and noticed the boy’s outfit. He remarked to his mother that he owned a new shirt just like the one the neighbor was wearing. “Not anymore,” she replied. When she died, Bart found a package of his things in his mother’s room, waiting to be delivered to someone else.

She was waked in her parlor and her friends came from the city by bus to mourn her. When an MTA bus driver showed up, her children asked him how he knew their mother. “I didn’t,” he said. He had overheard my great-grandmother’s friends telling stories about her and he wanted to pay his respects.

I can’t claim to have even a fraction of my great-grandmother’s generosity. But I have her strength. It’s in the house. I know the beauty and magic of this place, even with its long list of repairs. I returned home so that I could venture out, buoyed by the spirit of Ma McDonough. Through her, I understand the value of women — whether they lead countries, break barriers, create homes or care for communities. I live in the house where I was raised because it is my history.

About Liz:
Liz O’Donnell is Ma McDonough’s great-grandaughter and the founder of Hello Ladies, named one of the top 100 websites for women by Forbes. She is a frequent writer and commentator on women’s issues who draws on her own experiences as a marketing executive, mother, and community leader in her work. Liz’s byline has appeared in The Atlanta Journal Constitution, the Tampa Tribune and The Glass Hammer.

Best of International Women’s Day: Be a Front Porch Lady

by Guest on March 11th, 2011
in Know Your History and tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

How did you recognize the 100th anniversary of International Women’s Day March 8? If you haven’t yet signed the “Million for a Billion” petition to tell Congress you want them to fund international family planning and save the lives of so many women and children around the world, please do so here. This is one meaningful way to honor the women who founded IWD to promote equality for women, including the right to vote and hold public office. Another is to reach out to help another woman. Today’s guest post from Kathy Korman Frey, entrepreneur in residence at George Washington University School of Business and founder of The Hot Mommas Project tells just such a story. Read on, and keep reading for a roundup of some of the best of IWD posts:

A dignified, beautiful, African-American woman stood at the podium during the Wake Forest Women’s Weekend. All eyes were on Esther Silver-Parker, one of the most senior former executives at Wal-Mart and now president of the Silver-Parker Group. Would she talk about women’s advancement to the C-suite? Would she share her secrets to success? That, she did. And one of them was not at all what we expected.

Silver-Parker grew up in rural North Carolina, in a two-bedroom house, with her parents and many siblings. She recounted a screenplay-like story about a group of women she called: The Front Porch Ladies. “The Front Porch Ladies were the women who sat on their front porches as we came home from school,” Silver-Parker said. “They would treat our business like it was their business.”

When Silver-Parker was accepted to college, imagine her surprise when the Front Porch Ladies showed up on her front porch. There they all stood, having brought with them a full set of blue luggage for her to take off to school. “From time to time at college, I would get letters from the Front Porch Ladies,” Silver-Parker told the audience. “They would write words of encouragement, and sometimes include a dollar or two.”

A group of women, probably over-looked and taken for granted, played a pivotal and memorable role in a young woman’s life. And, there, now, with her silver hair and power suit, Silver-Parker remembered the Front Porch Ladies.

Will YOU take it upon yourself to get involved in the life of a woman you know, to help aggressively and actively?

Are we evolving, as a society of women, to do what it take to be successful? Here, today, is our chance.

The below graph indicates a fascinating pattern: Search trends for “International Women’s Day” have been on the decline…until, that is, THIS YEAR. Is there something in the air? Will you be part of it?

Be a Front Porch Lady.

Be part of the New Sisterhood. Stand on YOUR front porch, and call out. Get involved in the life of another woman. The time for pleasantries and being polite is over. The time for KNOWING that we can and will help one another is here.

IWD posts splashed out from every corner of the web on March 8. Many on Twitter argued that women should celebrate women every day of the year, not just during the month of March. I wholeheartedly agree with that sentiment – which should be pretty clear for those who have read my book No Excuses. I am passionate about encouraging women to embrace their “power to” – power to change their lives, power to change the world, power to make a difference. Here’s a completely arbitrary list of some of the best posts from International Women’s Day worth a read any day:

Top 10 Wins for Women – Global Women’s Fund
Meet 10 Women Who Have Changed Canadian Politics – Vancouver Sun
Busting the Top 10 Myths About Women – AAUW Blog (are you starting to sense a trend with the Top 10 Lists? ;^) )

Liz O’Donnell wrote about why it’s important for women to have equality in the STEM–science, technology, engineering, and mathematics fields–on her Hello Ladies blog.

The Guardian provides a list of the Top 100 Women of Science.

From Susan Macaulay at Amazing Women Rock, a truly amazing overview of TED’s lack of gender parity and why it continues even though there are some, well, amazing, women speakers.

If you need more inspiration, Change.org produced a smashing list of activist opportunities that channel the spirit of IWD:

Finally, a big thank you UN Women for producing this video celebrating the global achievements of women over the last 100 years.

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Sportswomen – How Alice Marble Led the Way for Althea Gibson

by Guest on March 3rd, 2011
in Know Your History and tagged , , , , ,

Sports isn’t my strong suit. But it’s only appropriate that women who have led the way in the sports world should be highlighted within my Women’s History Month posts. So I asked my friend Beverly Wettenstein, who often writes and speaks on this topic, to guest post this article, originally published on Huffington Post.

Althea Gibson’s induction into the US Open Court of Champions, on the 50th anniversary of her historic title victory, was inspiring. The Opening Night Tribute, to celebrate living African-American women who have also broken barriers in sports, entertainment, politics and the arts, was impressive. Venus and Serena Williams paid fitting tribute to Gibson by winning their opening night matches. Serena Williams became the first African-American woman since Gibson to win the US Open in 1999. The next year, Venus Williams was the first African-American woman since Gibson to win Wimbledon.

However, Alice Marble’s significant role, as the leading public proponent and catalyst for Althea Gibson to break the color barrier in U.S. tennis, should not be overlooked. Women’s contributions are often not properly credited in history and sports books and media coverage. Researching my Women in History and Making History Today — 365-Days-A-Year Database and A WOMAN’S BOOK OF DAYS, I’ve confirmed that less than ten percent of the references in new history textbooks are about women. “Anonymous” may be a woman.

Who was Alice Marble, you may rightfully ask? Alice Marble was the white tennis player who won the U.S. singles titles four times and Wimbledon in 1939. She was ranked number one in the world, 1936-1940, and was named the AP Female Athlete of the year in 1939 and 1940. Marble broke world records to become the first woman to win both Wimbledon and the US Open singles, doubles, and mixed doubles titles in the same year, 1939. She was inducted into the International Tennis Hall of Fame in 1964, the winner of 12 US Open and five Wimbledon titles.

More importantly, and integral to the Althea Gibson story, Marble was the first to publicly address the sport’s segregation practices and challenge the establishment. She wrote her historic July 1, 1950 editorial in American Tennis Magazine. Marble denounced the all-white U.S. Lawn Tennis Association’s policy of excluding African-Americans from competition. She exhorted, “If tennis is a game for ladies and gentlemen, it’s also time we acted a little more like gentlepeople and less like sanctimonious hypocrites. If Althea Gibson represents a challenge to the present crop of women players, it’s only fair that they should meet that challenge on the courts.”

As a result of Marble’s courageous and tenacious editorial, and her well-respected position, Gibson, 23, was invited to play in the 1950 U.S National Championships (now the US Open) and won the championship that year. Thus, she became the first African-American player, man or woman, to compete in a Grand Slam event. In 1957, she became the first African-American to win Wimbledon and the U.S. Nationals and the first to be named the AP Female Athlete of the Year.

Alice Marble also was a fashion trendsetter. She dared to wear white shorts on the court in 1932, instead of the customary long skirt and restrictive, heavy clothing of the times. Such a fashion statement was considered outrageous, until function and practicality were accepted in female sports attire and ultimately revolutionized the standards for women’s casual clothing.

This year has marked important milestones for women tennis champions. For years, I’ve lauded Billie Jean King’s often-solitary crusade for equal prize pay, in my A Woman’s Place in the 21st Century speeches around the country and Letters to the Editor (New York Times, September 7, 2001). Following her 1972 US Open win, King threatened to boycott (girlcott?) the event the next year, unless the female champion received the same award as the male winner. Hence, the USTA led the Grand Slam tournaments in prize parity since 1973. This year’s women’s and men’s singles champion will earn $1.4 million each, plus possible $1 million bonus prize.

Wimbledon finally joined the other Grand Slam events and allowed the women winners to crack the grass ceiling. Venus Williams won her fourth Wimbledon title, and the first equal prize in 123 years (approximately $1.3 million), in July. She publicly acknowledged Billie Jean King for leading the equal prize campaign.

The media frequently promote a Mean Girls catfight mentality, by highlighting negative role models and publicizing bad behavior. To the contrary, in my own speeches and writings, the positive messages of empowerment are: “Celebrate Women Every Day!” and “Women Support Women!”

For example, in 1960, when Billie Jean King was sixteen years old and ranked nineteenth in the country, she had an opportunity to work with Alice Marble as her coach every weekend. Serena and Venus Williams appreciated Althea Gibson’s motivational telephone talks and cited her achievements.

Remembering history – and following the mentoring tradition set by Alice Marble to Althea Gibson to Billie Jean King to the current players — leads me to propose a monumental tribute at the US Open to these three women. Their lasting legacy represents solidarity, support and sisterhood. I foresee a plaque signifying: “Women Champions — Champions for Women.” All three tennis pioneers came from humble backgrounds, played on public courts, surmounted personal and professional challenges and public scrutiny, to empower future women players.

Certainly, I invite your ideas on how to honor these distinguished role models who have served us so well — on and off the court.

About Beverly:
Beverly Wettenstein speaks nationally on “A Woman’s Place in the 21st Century” and is published in Huffingtonpost.com and major media. She is the founder of the “Women in History & Making History Today – 365-Days-a-Year Database” and author of “A WOMAN’S BOOK OF DAYS.”

The Women’s Eye Sees the 9 Ways

by Gloria Feldt on December 29th, 2010
in No Excuses, Power Tools and tagged , , , , , , , , , , , ,

Interview by Pamela Burke of The Women’s Eye Blog: Gloria Feldt On 9 Ways To Embrace Your Power

"The Women's Eye" Herself:Pamela Burke

29 Dec

Gloria Feldt has a passion for bettering women’s lives. She’s a renowned activist, commentator, teacher, and author. In her early years as a mother of three living in west Texas, she called herself a “desperate housewife.” Yet she rose to find her voice as President and CEO of Planned Parenthood from 1996-2005.

“It’s up to us to develop a more positive relationship with power, to define power on our terms and embrace it…” Gloria Feldt

Her most recent book “No Excuses–9 Ways Women Can Change How We Think About Power” has been received with widespread praise. It’s been called “groundbreaking” and “attitude-changing,” and “the most daring.”

I’ve known Gloria for several years now and have attended her inspiring lectures. She’s certainly embraced her own power as her book is climbing best-seller lists. I am delighted I had the opportunity to ask Gloria how she finally found her own identity and to get her advice for others we begin 2011…

EYE: You’ve wrestled with finding your own voice throughout your life. Do you think the struggle is finally over?

GLORIA: I am only now truly finding my own authentic and unedited voice. It was a great privilege to be able to make my passion for women’s equality and justice into my life’s work for 30 years.

But what I discovered is that just as I’d allowed myself to be subsumed and led by what the culture expected of me as a young woman, I did what was wanted and needed of me to advance the cause as a movement leader.

Then, the first book I wrote after I left Planned Parenthood started out as Kathleen Turner’s biography, “Send Yourself Roses,” but to be marketable it became her memoir. I was the co-author, yet writing in her voice. Writing someone else’s life is like getting a year’s free psychotherapy.

I was confronted with the reality that I’d done it again—followed the same pattern of subsuming my voice to others.

So now, in this third act of my life, my power struggle has been to get clear about and stay with my own intention: to write my fourth book in my own true voice that speaks to other women about our ambivalent relationship with power.

And I’m very pleased with the response from women of all ages like comments you can read on Manisha Thakor’s website. She’s the founder of the Women’s Financial Literacy Initiative.

“Women can now raise money as well as men, are trusted by the voters more than men, and when they run they are statistically as likely to win.”

EYE: What inspired you to write “No Excuses”? Was it your personal experience?

GLORIA: They say you write the book you need to read. “No Excuses” turned out to be exactly that. The direct trigger was when I researched an article for Elle Magazine in 2008. I looked at the many organizations that help women run for office.

I found that despite their excellent programs, they have scarcely moved the dial in the last two decades. Women are 51% of the population, 54% of the voters, and 17% of Congress, 23% of state legislatures, and 10% of the mayors of the 100 largest cities.

But what really blew me away was to find that it was no longer external barriers holding women back. Women can now raise money as well as men, are trusted by the voters more than men, and when they run they are statistically as likely to win.

Lilly Ledbetter and Gloria Feldt

EYE: Can you give an example of a woman who conquered injustice and used her power well?

GLORIA: Lilly Ledbetter is a great example. When she found out that she was paid less than her male co-workers at the Goodyear Tire and Rubber Company, she began the fight for women and girls who deserved equal pay for equal work.

The Lilly Ledbetter Fair Pay Act was signed by President Obama in 2009 insuring that employees can challenge pay discrimination.
Other examples are Margaret Sanger, Rosa Parks, Sojourner Truth, Eleanor Roosevelt, and many young women today like Emily May who started iHollaback, a movement dedicated to end street harassment as you can see in this video:

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Another interesting person is Courtney Martin who interviews the next generation of activists in her new book “Do It Anyway” and urges young people to engage in philanthropy.

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EYE: What do you think is holding some women back?

GLORIA: It turns out that the same dynamics exist in the workplace as well and in personal relationships. Women have an ambivalent relationship with power. Not necessarily less ambition than men, but less intention to hold positions that society deems powerful.

You can’t win public office if you don’t run. You can’t become an executive if you don’t put your name in the hat. It matters that we do reach our full potential including taking our rightful equal place making the policies and products that affect our lives.

EYE: You talk about Kathryn Bigelow winning the Academy Award and how that could have been a more empowering moment for women. How?

GLORIA: She could have said, “I am honored to be the first woman and I hope that my success will inspire many more women to do what I have done, as well to encourage the Academy to look to the many talented women directors.”

Sally Hawkins, the star of the movie “Made In Dagenham” about the 1968 strike by women workers at Ford Motor Company in the UK over gender pay discrimination, said this to journalist Jessica Wakeman at thefrisky.com: “If you’re a woman and you say that you’re not a feminist then you’re an idiot, basically. How can you not be passionate about our rights? It doesn’t make any sense.”

That’s the kind of comment that Bigelow might have made if she wanted to be more than an Oscar winner but also a woman who helps other women succeed.

“It’s up to us to develop a more positive relationship with power, to define power on our terms…”

EYE: You say women are stuck. We’ve broken the glass ceiling in so many places, yet you say we haven’t reached our full potential. Why?

GLORIA: Ambivalence about power stands in the way. Every door has been opened at least once and we’ve changed the laws. We’ve come a very long way. I celebrate that. To complete the journey though women must continue walking through the doors that are open.

No one will do that for us. Why should they? It’s up to us to develop a more positive relationship with power, to define power on our terms and embrace it, stand in it, and walk with intention to lead our own dreams.

Power over is oppression; power-to is leadership. Power over is from Mars. Power-to is from Venus. Women love having the power-to.

EYE: You quote Roseanne: “The thing women have to learn is no one gives it to you—you have to take it.” Is that the best way to gain power?

GLORIA: It’s the only way. And don’t expect anyone to attribute more power to you than you attribute to yourself.

EYE: Why do some women come to power and then, as you say, step back?

GLORIA: It’s hard to change a culture while you’re living in it. Sometimes it’s just a lot easier not to take on the responsibility of power, or even the responsibility to make our own choices. Sometimes, women become discouraged or are coopted by those who belittle them when they strive for more. There are many reasons but I say there are no excuses any more.

“When you can stand in your power, it’s no longer as enticing to play the passive-aggressive…”

EYE: You say we take the boniest part of the chicken and leave the rest. That’s not exactly a compliment. What do you mean by this?

GLORIA: Women are socialized to think of others first. That’s not a bad thing, or wouldn’t be if men were also socialized the same way. Recently I said in a speech to a group of women that no one loves you more because you’ve used yourself up for them.

A murmur or recognition went across the auditorium and it was the most quoted line in the post-event blogs and comments. When you can stand in your power, it’s no longer as enticing to play the passive-aggressive or the martyr as many of our own mothers did.

EYE: You call your book a “battle cry for women.” What is it they have to do to gain this power you say is so important?

GLORIA: I think I said it is a clarion call. Wake up, sisters. Use the 9 Ways:

EYE: In spite of a lot of negative stats about just how far women have come in some respects, you seem optimistic. Do you think women are beginning to take on this “No Excuses” attitude of yours or do we have a long way to go?

GLORIA: Both. I wrote “No Excuses” to speed the dial of progress. At the current rate, it’ll be 70 years till women reach parity. I don’t think that’s right or fair. And besides, I can’t live that long. And as an activist for 40 years, I want to see us do better.

That’s why I devote at least half the book to the 9 Ways, specific and practical “power tools” women can use to help themselves cope with the challenges, stand in their own power, and ultimately to lead unlimited lives. I invite readers to my website www.GloriaFeldt.com, and especially to join the conversation on the 9 Ways blog, www.GloriaFeldt.com/9ways.

EYE: Are you feeling more power within yourself now with the publication of your book?

GLORIA: Absolutely. And I remind myself of No Excuses’ lessons several times a day. I revised my language several times in this q and a to avoid self-deprecating comments that diminish how I represent myself and thus dissipate the power of my words and ideas.

EYE: Thanks, Gloria. There should be No Excuses after reading your 9 Ways’ List!

It Takes Persistence to Move a Mountain

by Gloria Feldt on December 1st, 2010
in Create a Movement, Power Tools and tagged , , , , ,
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Blogger Beth Terry of Fake Plastic Fish is an amazing woman. I was so moved by her how she used the three principles of movement building: be a sister by reaching out to others with similar concerns, have the courage to raise issues that you feel are important, and put the two together systematically to create movement. Watch the video of Beth telling her story of why and how she persuaded Brita to offer recyclable water filters to US consumers. I knew I had to highlight it in No Excuses the moment I heard about her.

What’s your story? How have you been able to use movement building principles to achieve a goal? What was the issue you wanted to take on? What was the result?

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